I feel myself growing, expanding, and realize I am both nothing and all things simultaneously. I am formless and limitless as I hurtle forward into the void. I don’t know how I’m moving. I hear nothing, silence, save the soft ”whoosh” of as though air or a breeze is passing. There is nothing above, below, or around me, only blackness. Yet, I can feel movement and energy as I’m hurtling forward. I feel the infinite. The expansion of time and space and it falls away; tumbling. The gates of time and space spontaneously opening one after the other, energy shifting sequentially and I can sense this. I can feel space and time dimensions shifting and expanding. I shift my awareness away from this and focus forward, in front of me. I look into the expanding black before me and there it is, I see it; the small spark of light, far off to my right. It was like looking down a long, dark, constantly shifting, curved passage with a pinprick of intensely magnified light. So brilliant and intense I could hardly look at it and yet, I cannot look away. Compelling me, how wondrous, curious, engaging it is; what is it that light? So small, so far away, I must see it closer. The light is so compelling and captivating. I am hurtling towards and yet it seems no closer. I think I’m nearing it as it grows in size and yet, I don’t seem closer. I am intensely curious, and yet confounded as I can’t seem to get close enough. I want to be in it, on it, of it. Be one with it but it seems just out of reach. I can’t reach for it, for I know now I have no hands, arms or body. I just want to be the light. If only I could get closer.
At last I’m almost on the light I feel myself getting thinner, growing scarcer, becoming diffuse. Every molecule of my energy begins to slow as I finally approach the light. I’m distracted by something to my left, a shift of dimension. Some intensity is growing as mine dims. I sense an pulsing vortex of whorling energy, luminous from within, pink. Out of this energy she emerges, faint and far away. Her pace quickens and as she approaches. I see her grow from the young dog I once knew sleek yellow and quick-stepped; to the aged, white, plodding, arthritic, gentle companion. I stop immediately, captivated by pink clouds of energy whirling around her that soon envelop me. “Hello Sandy”, I say. Hello as though it’s just another day of her greeting me at the front door or meeting me at the top of the stairs all wiggling hindquarters and dancing delight.
She came trotting to my left side and my vision immediately locked onto her but from above her shoulders. Here, I could feel her fur was coarser than elsewhere on her body, just like when she was alive. But, she isn’t alive, I know she’s dead. We said our good-byes. And how am I feeling her? I have no hands. She paused as if she was making certain I was still with her, securely fastened to her. I was; no sooner was I fastened when I could feel love coming from her. The most incredible, powerful love of oneness, care, and compassion. We were enveloped by the pink whirling compassionate love. I was OK now, she had me, we had each other and I had stopped moving forward into the bright white light.